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King Kong
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26 with Ape. Also 3 dinosaurs, 4 T-Rexes, 35 various giant insects and 3 giant bats.
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Troll
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3 people, 1 demon and a cop
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Hatchetman
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7, one 1/2 dead hatchetman, and one doomed engagement
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Troll 2
(A.K.A. should have been called Goblins because there was absolutely no mention of the word "Troll". Also in desperate need of a good writer, good actors and a continuity person)
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5 people and a witch and some goblins via a double decker bologna sandwich and dear god I wish I was kidding. Terrible.
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Bride of Chucky
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8 and 1 and 1/2 dolls. Also, one killer baby doll was spewed.
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Club Dread
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3 before the credits, then 10 more. And 2 quotes.
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Resident Evil: Apocalypse
(Rated R for non-stop violence)
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111, plus 1 that we almost missed because we were too busy talking about sex, 4 dogs, 3 lickers and an entire city (including 1 nemesis boyfriend)
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Little Shop of Horrors
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2 and a plant
(However, in the original ending that Frank Oz shot, the true body count would be 4 and no plant. Test audiences hated this ending so much that he changed it for the theatrical release.)
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Pet Sematary II
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7 people, 2 dogs (1 euthanized, 1 shot), 3 kittens, 22 rabbits, and 1 zombie rape
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Formula 51
(In which Samuel L. Jackson said “motherfucker” 5 times)
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15 and 1 exploded Meatloaf
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Monster House
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1 monster house, 1 dog, 2 cops (More people were eaten by the monster house but at the end they magically reappeared and we had to cross them off the list.)
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Dead Alive
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37, 1 rat monkey, 1 monkey, 1 dog and 1 rat
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Hellraiser III: Hell on Earth
(in which all the women had huge, drawn-on eyebrows and we couldn't pay attention to the plot because we couldn't stop staring at their eyebrows)
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177 people, 1 rat, 1 head explosion
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Hellraiser: Inferno
(Worst Hellraiser EVER! Halfway through it we started chanting "PINHEAD! PINHEAD! PINHEAD!")
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9
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Time Bandits
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37, plus 1 minotaur, 1 rat, 1 Evil Genius and everyone that died on the Titanic
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Munchies
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2 people, 8 munchies and some tropical fish
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Ghoulies
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1 (I hate when people come back to life)
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Ghoulies II
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7 people, 4 ghoulies, and one ghoulie eater
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Underworld
(It's hard to tell when they're immortal.)
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15 vampires, 29 lycan and one half lycan, half vampire fetus
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Open Water
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2 whiny assholes and one underwater camera eaten by a mako shark
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The Scorned
(Basically soft-core porn)
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4, plus 1 death by a kamikaze goldfish, 2 deaths by lava lamp, one phone and all of the careers of the “actors” involved in making this movie.
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The Running Man
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18 before the opening titles ended, 60 innocent men, women & children, 4 stalkers and then 14 more people
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Tremors
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9 people, 20 sheep, 1 horse, 4 graboids
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Dark Town
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14 people, 9 vampires, 1 baby and 1 cat
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Night of the Comet
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The entire population of Earth in 1986 except for 6 people. Plus 2 cars.
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Snakes on a Plane
(#100!)
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62 people, 54 snakes, 1 cat and 1 dog. Also, Samuel L. Jackson said motherfucker/ing five times.
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Total Recall
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49, plus 16 fish, 1 rat, 1 Jonny Cab and 1 three-breasted mutant hooker
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Beerfest
(Next time bring lettuce.)
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4, a trophy, a deer, and a batch of monkey-frogs
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The Island
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22, plus 2 police officers and 40 "defective" (read: free-thinking) clones
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Devour
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1 cougar, 10 people and 1 deer
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Deep Evil
(These people should hang their heads in shame.)
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7 and 12 aliens
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Petrified
(Danny Draven is fired for bad editing.)
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6 people and 1 alien mummy destroyed by salt like a slug. Also, one woman's hair and one FBI partner mysteriously disappeared between one scene and the next.
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Python
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14 and 1 giant genetically-enhanced python
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The Nest
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7 people, 1 dog, 1 rat, 1 cat-roach, 1 roach-man, 1 Roach Master Deluxe and at least 36 roaches
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Apocalypto
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59 people, 1 tapir, 3 ants, 1 jaguar, 1 monkey and 1 snake
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The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy (2005)
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Planet Earth, minus 2 people, minus 2 aliens, and minus all of the dolphins. Plus 2 crabs, 1 sperm whale, 1 bowl of petunias and an entire battle fleet of strange and warlike beings resplendent in black jeweled battle shorts. Plus two "mice."
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